melodiesofeternity | [Closed] Spirits High and Low: Workin' for the Weekend

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[Closed] Spirits High and Low: Workin' for the Weekend

Who: Kanji, Naomi, Okuyasu, Dante ~~must dine~~, Naoto, Snow White, Kuja, Red and Adrien
When: Throughout October
Where: Hisan, Lavode, Kiddilion, Nakagawa, Sparks Golsaucia
What: Things are gettin' a little spooky in Vaikuntha! Kanji's not the sharpest crayon in the box, but that doesn't stop him from helping anybody he can with what he's got!
Warnings/Notes: Kanji's got a dirty mouth. Okuyasu's got a dirty mouth. Red's got dog puns. Cover the eyes of the children, before they F-bomb you at the dinner table.

"Shit... still ain't enough." He scowled at the number down on the corner of the iMog display. He'd been saving up for something, but wasn't realizing just how expensive it truly was. He'd worked extra hours, dunked in commissions almost daily, and flexed every last brain cell using the budgeting tips he'd learned from his mother, ever the businesswoman.

Hell, if it weren't for her, Junes would have turned its eyes on devouring Tatsumi Textiles like it had with so many of its neighbors. Couldn't top her dye technique, that's for sure.

"Ufufuuuu... planning a secret shopping trip for you-know-who? Starlight's coming up, kupo... and don't you dare forget to pick up something for me!" From her little hammock, Crepe Suzette the moogle looked away from her notepad, a rather comically oversized quill brought to pause from scratching away a few notes.

"None'a your business! I already got my Christmas stuff worked out, anyway. Even for you."

"So thoughtful, kupo! Now, I suppose I should do you a favor and speak with Cristo..."

"Naoto's moogle? What for?"

Suzette stared at him. Then, with a sigh, she went back to her notebook, the quill scratching continuing. "Never you mind, brute. If you're short on the shine, you just have to dig around for rumors and perhaps take on a few quests, kupo. There's never a shortage of work for a tank, especially one that's nearly mastered two tanking Asterisks, kupo! So get off your butt and let's get going! I never liked being idle, kupo."

Kanji shrugged and tucked away the slate. Might as well head out now. With her writing implements stowed away, Suzette found a perch in the hood of the boy's sweatshirt, wiggled to get comfortable, and hoped he knew where he needed to go first.

[ooc: Second verse, same as the first. Top-levels are each individual quest.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[You know, they should be focusing on waiting for that last sliver of sunlight to disappear behind the horizon and get to the bottom of the clue he'd found- bumping into Red along the way- focusing on the mission at hand.

But... but Red's ears looked super fluffy today.]

Come on, just- just one little pet before the whatever shows up...!

[Oh my d--]

You're still going on about that?!

[It wasn't as though Red had any doubts or hangups about having Kanji present for this undertaking. After all, he'd SEEN the big guy in action back in Ka'pandol; it wasn't like he was in bad company here.

He just didn't think that Kanji- of all people, Kanji?!- was the sort who'd push him into having this talk again.]

Why does everyone and their Moogle wanna pet me?! Am I crazy for thinkin' this is really weird?! Is it some kinda Vaikunthan thing?! Is it my deodorant?!

[It WAS getting a little dark as the sun finished its dip past the horizon, but Red wasn't paying much mind to it anymore-- this had gone on long enough.]

Seriously! What gives?!

Because people pet dogs! Dogs're... y'know the ones you see in the Berserker's Guild? Walks on all fours? THOSE are dogs! They don't look like people, like you do.

So... y'know, if our dogs like bein' pet, we figure maybe you guys like bein' pet! S'that so hard to work out?

Exactly! Those little four-legged furry things look as close to me as those dolls you make look to you!

[It seemed incongruous. Maybe even a little bit insulting. How could anyone not see a difference?!]

Besides, I don't see you humans tryin' to pet every monster or beast you come across! What's the big deal with dogs that makes me so... petable?!

Dogs're important, okay!? They help sick people, they stay next to people who're dyin' and have nobody else, and they're family! We owe a whole lot to dogs back home and in so many other worlds, so... y'know! It ain't a stretch to see why people wanna pet a dog!

They don't talk, so it's our way of sayin' they did a good job. If I were a dog person I'd fuckin' LOVE pets!

Oh, really. Then what if I--

[...Wait. It may have taken a few seconds, but all that stuff Kanji said about dogs- and even the tone he spoke it in- slowly started settling in. Red's look slowly melts from a scowl to an almost curious stare.]

...So humans and dogs were... really close?

People like to joke all the time that we don't deserve dogs... and I kinda agree with 'em. Dogs're just... good. Kids get puppies and get to grow up beside each other as best friends. They cry for weeks when the dog dies from gettin' sick or too old, and then they tell all these stories about 'em to their friends, all this great shit they did together, stuff they never forget.

I'd cry as a kid because I couldn't have a dog. The fur'd get all over the cloth. I just thought it was so cool to have somethin' like that to be my pal and I can take care of 'em and love 'em and they'd just... love me back.

Humans and dogs weren't just close. They were family.

...they were your favorites.

[A very large number of otherwise-confusing pieces of a long-standing puzzle quite suddenly tumbled into place. Red's stare starts seeming less like a glare at Kanji and more like he's looking out a thousand yards.

Dogs were the favorites of humans. Caninu and--]

--Felineko! Cats? Whaddayacallem, uh...

Cats, yeah! People can claim they're a cat person or a dog person. Lotta debates on which makes a better pet. I'm kinda in the middle. Ya can't beat when a happy cat purrs in your lap, but you also can't deny a dog that walks up and leans on ya 'cause they want a hug or somethin'.

So... does that make a little more sense for ya?

Oh my dog.

[Give Red a minute here, Kanji-- you just settled one of the biggest nagging mysteries he had remaining from one of the biggest bombshells ever dropped on him.

Humans, cats, and dogs. Of course that's why...!]

It makes too much sense!! You guys picked us out!!

Picked...?

[He scratched his head.]

What'd I do? What's goin' on?

No, not you, your--

[...What was he supposed to say? Your species? Your people? How much did the sort of humans in Kanji's world have in common with the ones that once existed back home?

Red gave a labored sigh.]

We gotta focus up. You see anythin' out there?

Er, right. Uhh... it's dark enough, so it's a good time to look for any signs of somethin' weird. Too warm around here for ghost-y shit.

I'm gonna check over that hill. Wait here.

[What, was Kanji used to fighting ghosts or something? But still, Red would nod, double-checking the ports in his armor.]

Just shout if you hear anything comin'.

[He hurried up the path and thought nothing of the implication. You fight monsters here all the time, you just get used to weird shit. At least Shadows weren't a thing here-

It should have been like a freight train barreling through him. Instead, it was like having a belly full of ice for just a blink as a figure on chocobo-back stormed right through his body, moving up and over the hill and making tracks toward Red. Kanji, panicked, pat himself but saw no outside damage. It all happened so fast...!]

O-oi, heads up...!

[Okay, Red might not have been entirely focused up after that particularly eye-opening discussion about the relationship between humans and dogs-- both on account of the questions suddenly answered from back in his own world and some new ramifications with regard to a certain--]

--Buh...?

[OH FURBALLS ENEMY APPROACHING! Red is quick to draw his Gunblade, the ports on his Magitek armor starting to glow with warmth as he braced himself for a mounted attack from their ghostly assailant. An attack that thankfully never game, as the dark figure suddenly veered wide, raised its hand, and...

...hucked a kupo nut to bonk against Red's noggin.]

OW!

[...what.]

[Donk. Get dunked, son. The chocobo gave a shrill cry and circled around, working on another pass and fierce, devastating attack to Red's skull!]

KUPAW-HAW-HAW-HAAAAW! Give me your head, kupo!

[Kanji geared up. He swapped for a change of pace to his Black Mage Asterisk. Just give him a moment.]

[Not THIS time, you nut-slinging lunatic! Red may be caught in the middle of loading up his gunblade with •Fire Bullets, but he wouldn't be caught off-guard this time; Red's quick to shield his head with his gauntlet, knowing that the next kupo nut would--

..No, scratch that, it hit him in the eye this time.]

UWAAAHH!!

[Red repositioned his hand a bit more tactically over his eye while he staggered and stumbled away. Ugh, those stupid kupo nuts hurt...!!]

This guy's tickin' me off!!

Edited 2018-10-19 23:21 (UTC)

Moogles, man... they're cute but I'm gettin' a little tired of 'em!

[He swept a hand to the side, throwing a spray of icicles to trip up the avian steed, all while he hurried down the hill to catch up.

The chocobo began to slip and slide on the newly-formed ice slick, the horseman fighting with the reins to keep the bird steady.]

No you oaf, kupo, use your CLAWS...!

[Hopefully this headless Mog still had his butt, because Red was itching to RAM HIS BOOT UP IT. After some further fumbling-- to heck with it, four shots loaded was enough!-- Red finally closed up his gunblade's chamber.

But perhaps he wouldn't have to use it after all. It'd be easier just getting that stupid mog dismounted. So his first move wouldn't be quite so fancy... it'd just be a swift punch with his gauntlet while the Mog struggled with the terrain.

Let's see it try and sling those kupo nuts around from ankle-height.]

Where in the underworld did I even FIND you, kupo!? What're you- OOF-

[Slugged by the caninu. The chocobo wailed, wavered, and fell in a heap. The headless moogle, in the meantime, fell and bounced.

Bounced and rolled.

A pumpkin growing in a nearby patch stopped him with a FLUMP, leaving his little legs kicking as he fought to stay upright. Kanji finally caught up and frowned, peering from beneath his hood.]

Huh. Annoying, but easy. So, what happens-

[The moogle finally got himself upright, paws patting the large pumpkin now sitting on his shoulders. Then he just sort of... stood there, claws feeling over where a face would be.]

...Uhhh...

...Uhhh...?

[Wait. Was that it? One punch and he goes down? Was that even supposed to work on ghosts? Or did Red whallop him so hard he actually got confused?

...Somewhat hesitantly, Red walked over, kneeled down, and prodded the gourd-prosthetic with the hilt of his gunblade.]

...You done, guy?

[The moogle's response was to put up his tiny dukes and try to swing blindly at the prodding gunblade that poked at him.]

GIVE ME YOUR HEAD, you cur...!

But you freakin' HAVE a... a head...?

Pff. Yeah, and it's an improvement. [Maybe it didn't make that much sense given he didn't even have a head before, but it was still enough of a joke for Red to laugh.

Still squinting his struck eye, Red crams the Kupo nut squarely in the middle.]

There's your nose.

Hah! That's a cute nose. Look, I think he likes it.

Wait, he's been bitchin' about a head this whole time. Maybe it's not takin' our heads but takin' A head. Y'think?

"Legend of Sleepy Kupollow", closed to Red

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